Where were you?

Far across a land, I had never been to,

There was a treasure which was a legend.

Some said it was the creation of God,

And others that it was the Holy Grail of our times.

Deep in the dungeon of my life I was trapped,

Where the only concern was to be or not to be,

Some said the only way to break free was a quest,

And others opined that it would be foolish to go on a wild goose chase.

Then one day, I saw a moon kissing the star,

It left me wondering how the moon touched the star.

And it struck me that life’s just an illusion,

Sometimes it lets you walk on water,

And sometimes sucks you deep within.

I had resolved that the only way out of this trap was a quest,

To a land far away that existed only in legends and in my dreams.

I ran…ran and ran…to a place where earth touched the sky.

But that never came so I kept running.

I asked someone if they knew about the treasure,

And they told me a secret that none had known before.

One after the other the secrets kept tumbling out,

And what was once a legend was now a princess who was wilting with seasons.

When the palace where you were was insight,

There were no dragons and fires to scare me away…

Just a single long tunnel to across,

And I saw you on the other end of it…waiting for someone.

All I had to do was to cross the tunnel,

But little did I realize that those would be the most difficult steps I would take!

The demons of my past kept pulling me behind,

But that wouldn’t stop me going towards my glory of my future…inch by inch.

And today after all these years, I stand before you,

And wonder if I could touch you,

I couldn’t move an inch further because I was blinded,

Blinded by a beauty that was only in legends…a beauty which was a creation of God!

I shed a drop of tear out of happiness,

And something happened…something no one had told me before.

The flowers around bloom as if it was spring,

The lamps lit all by themselves and slowly darkness vanished…

As I stood agape to what had happened around, I see you lifting your face,

And there it was….the smile!

So, then we hold our hands and look into your eyes,

The pearls which had me rolling towards life,

And ask…”Where were you when the moon kissed the star?”

And you reply…”I was wondering how did the star touch the moon?”

And I smile as I lay my arms around you and gaze at the moon and the star kissing each other…again!

The Sea

There is a saying far in a land unknown,
“A drop of water can be saved forever, only when it is thrown into the sea”
I never knew what that meant,
And I wanted to be saved, for I was one.

I was born on the day when Gods sent me to earth,
Only to be lost in isolated paths of life,
And all through I would stare down at the stream below,
Which filled me with curiosity unknown.

One fine day, I took the plunge of my life,
Drooping from the great tree which held me safely,
Guess What?! That was the most adventurous thing I had done,
And the hills of my land couldn’t stop talking about the one, who took the wrong turn.

I couldn’t see where I was heading,
But met millions like me all the way,
And saw million eyes filled with hope and dreams,
But all had one thing in common, the will to reach the sea!

Holding and pushing ourselves downstream,
I looked up into the heaven to see if I could find my home?
All I could see were the clouds obscuring the little possible I could see.

For some reason, I felt lost and stopped for a while;
And when I looked back I could see a trail behind,
A proof that I had lived my life and made others follow.

It brought a smile on my little face,
And wondered how others see their lives as?
I asked,” O! My friend. which part of heaven are you from?”
He smiled and said, I don’t know, I am yet to find one.
And I knew, we would all eventually, in the sea!

The sea, made of millions like me,
Outwitting, outclassing those around,
It is this sense of struggle which keeps us going,
And I don’t know where to stop…where to end this journey.
When that happens, I know that I am saved forever, I am immortal…

And that part of heaven is called the sea,…made of millions like me,
Outwitting…outclassing each other to leave a trail for others to follow….

---Hemanth Kumar

(Written on 22/2/2008)

This one was written on my Birthday...22/2/2008...for all my friends...[:)]

Reminiscence

The streets are too desolate to imagine,
And so are the coffee shops around the corner,
Why am I walking on the road at this hour?
Darkness is all around and there is no light ahead.

I sat in the coffee shop for a drink,
The aroma of Chocolate was captivating,
Where have I come this day?
The scent of flowers reminds me of days past.

I used to gaze around and wonder where life was running,
The spring at that time was at its best,
On one fine day I ran into you,
And life was never the same again.

When blink of the eye was a moment wasted,
What more could I do to think about you?
I so wish I had the power to stop time,
Maybe then I can find a rhythm to my life’s hymn.

I followed your steps and took the same lanes,
It’s a wonder that I could never lose your sight,
How could I? I saw you everywhere I went,
And one find day I could tell what was dream and what reality…

I look at myself in the mirror,
And wonder whom I am seeing,
I lost my features….my identity,
Haven’t looked this good till now, and I don’t even know since when?!

And I ran to see you again,
To tell you that my dawn begins with a glimpse of your smile,
And ends when I can see you no longer,
To tell you that you have filled the void in my life,
And I can no longer stay alone!
I ran…and I kept running…

The world is a small place to hide,
But what do I do with this splinter in my mind,
How long would I have to run to find you?
I can’t see you, but I keep thinking maybe you are around,
I keep hoping that one day you will make me a part of your life…
And I keep running towards that day…thinking…hoping…..

THE MASK

think I cried the moment I was born,
But I still wonder how I brought smile back to the faces forlorn,
What kind of world have I entered?
Where ones sadness is another’s happiness.

Years later when I could walk and think on my own,
I realized that things are way too different than what they seem,
And to see them you need for yourself a mask,
It gives you an identity alien before.

And now I have many in my closet,
One for Monday and another for Tuesday,
I always have a smile and appear full of hope,
After all it’s a great way to start a week and kick start the race.

They wear out sooner than one can think of,
And I take out another two, one for Wednesday and another for Thursday,
I look all worked up and desperate for some break,
What more can you pray for than some peace of mind?

And they wear out sooner than one can think of,
Only 2 are left, one for Friday and another for Saturday,
What more can I ask for? I look as if I was born yesterday,
All I could think of was some fun and some frolic.

And I ran out of masks,
Thank Goodness, I didn’t have to wear any at least for one day,
The world looks so different without a disguise,
Everything’s so pure and exists in solitude and solace.

But who’s this in the mirror?
I have never seen him, though it’s me standing in front of the mirror,
I tried to draw my picture, but got lost in the contours of my face,
They keep changing, probably getting ready for the week ahead.

I wish I could throw away my masks,
And all those fake expressions and acts of purposeful existence,
But where would I stand devoid my mask?
It’s my identity and maybe my way of life…

And I open my closet to choose the mask for the day,
To go back to my existence and keep my life and conscience at fray,
To walk into oblivion and be one among you,
And keep believing that one day all of this would come to an end…

Rhyme of the Wind

Pitter-patter, pitter-patter;
The rhythm of the downpour accentuates the thunder in the clouds,
And the ferocious wind from the sea howls wildly,
I wonder if the Gods are having a fight up in the Heaven;

The rain descends to the ground below,
Flooding the roads and making all life come to a standstill,
Have never seen things around so calm,
I wish it rains like this everyday just to see everything still and soothing,

Alas, I never wished to see few things,
Like logs of wood floating in the sea,
I fear for a ship far from my sight,
Like an infant crying on the street,
I think about the mother, who has lost her child,
Like a leaf flying in the wind,
And I think about the tree turning bare.

This almost sounds like a lullaby,
Or maybe like a rhyme from a Gaelic bard.
The whispers of the breeze are too obstinate,
They fill the hopes and dreams of people of the spring ahead.

I wish the winds bring along with them,
A message from my Knight, who’s far away in a Crusade,
Oh…my Love, Why do you fight so much?
Don’t you see that it doesn’t even matter if you win?
All I want is your blade doesn’t taste more blood than this,
We don’t want to rule over a land of Ghosts!

I wish the rain washes away the blood on the land,
If not, it will always stay as a memoir of a battle once fought,
A battle which changed the course of history,
And turned brothers into Enemies

Oh God of Rain…What are you waiting for?
Unleash your power, and let the clouds drain out every bit,
Let the masks of people be washed away,
Let the disguise of egotism be unveiled,
Perhaps that day, their souls will drop,
Let them repent for what they have done,
And contemplate for what may lie ahead…

One Step Wayward...

The wheel spun faster than I thought,
And the day was just beginning to wake up,
Clear road ahead, and our gusto fraught,
Oh passerby, did you see the strangers who hit the road?

The ball of fire was too mellowed down,
And what a spectacle was that!
We stared directly into the Sun,
And felt like He was warming up for his routine!

The boulevard took us to lands unknown,
Fields in the countryside were fully mown,
But the Sunflowers smiled at us,
I think we were obstructing the Sun at that moment.

The fog cleared away,
And took away with it the solitude around,
The humming of the birds in trees and bustle of men around,
I wonder how things can change in a moment,
For a moment you see what freedom is, what Heaven is,
But then you realize that you are never alone and are still mortal!

Aimless and free of burden, what more could you ask for?
All we were doing was to find out where the road leads us,
And we go on….we go on…
And we would go on till the point where the road ends.

The Sun kept following us all the way,
I think even He got bored and finally hid the Sun behind the mountains,
The darkness wraps around leaving no void,
But still, there is never a moment morbid,
Maybe this is what happens when we stand and stare…

Sometimes a step out of our banal lives changes everything,
You see what you have been missing all the while,
Sometimes a moment well spent works wonders,
It stays on like that forever…memories are so hard to forget!

Sometimes I wonder if we have time for anything.
All we seem to do is run towards the next post,
Unaware of what lies ahead and hopeful of crossing the finish line,
Oh brother, look back, maybe you have missed a step or two…
Where would you run if there’s no road ahead?

Drop in the Rain

The clouds are too beautiful to describe,
And so is the rainbow spread across it,
I try to catch the glimpse over and over again,
But it just conjures up when I think of it,
Where does it go when I am awake?
I wish I could walk on the clouds and splash across the rain,

On the streets, early in the morning,
I see the birds chirping in oblivion,
I try to look around and come across few,
But I wonder if it’s the same voice that I heard?
The music stays on and so does the aroma of the dawn,
I wish the day goes on like this and wonder what if it doesn’t?

I step out and am lost in the crowd,
I try to find a way out,
And I end up taking a wrong turn in the maze,
There’s no way back and then only hope remains,
Hope that some new turns and ways come on the way,
What would happen if this goes on forever?

I end up taking the same road everyday,
And it leads to the same place,
I wonder where I would be if I had taken the other way,
What makes me turn towards the same turn everyday?
What if something else happens one fine day?
Where would I be on that day?

With the sun setting in the horizon,
I stare at the sky every night,
And wonder why do the stars appear all over the skies?
It doesn’t matter if I end up seeing a different star everyday,
They too end up doing the same thing over and over again,
What makes them different from what we are?
What makes them so beautiful night after night?

What if…what if…
I end up doing nothing and yet, there’s so much to look out for,
Oh…brother, don’t laugh at me; I am not lazy,
I don’t understand why I stand still in the race,
If idleness is boredom, then isn’t work?
If only you could see that there is no point trying to catch up with life,
You go and change the world, and I would stand beside to clap for you,
But the question is…what would you do if you were me?!

Walking Through Haze...

Cindrella…o…Cindrella,
What are you waiting for?
Days go on, but you won’t comply…
When shall thou realize the maze?
Up there from the tower,
What do you look for down here?
Miles and miles across,
There’s nothing but emptiness

You can’t move, you can’t shout,
Neither can you smile, nor can you laugh,
Yet you wait for the day to do all that
When shall thou realize that it’s not a matter of time,
But the confluence of you two which will free you.

The knight is too naïve to realize the truth,
He thinks, that there’s no tower on this earth which he has missed,
Yet he can’t find you and he keeps looking,
When shall he decode the enigma?
When shall he break the spell cast by the witch?

The witch was too shrewd and challenged the Knight to the crest,
And what a spell it was, she hid you inside your Knight’s heart!
But here’s the catch …you can’t be free unless one of you die!!!
Either way, it’s a heavy price to pay… my princess.

What if the knight realizes this spell?
I think, he would give his life to set you free,
But if he did, then would you want to be alive?!
So far, so good…no one knows this, neither he nor you.
And the search continues…

Look around Cindrella and you will hear your name rebound!
O Knight, look within she’s there in you,
Let there be no tears, and no fears…
You are bounded for eternity...this is just the other side of the spell.

Come what may, you won’t know this,
And the search continues,
And the day you realize the truth,
Neither of you shall survive.

Keep moving…keep looking, maybe one day you will take the road less traveled,
Maybe you will walk through haze without a clue what’s around
Who knows what you may come across, keep searching…keep walking.

The Dawn

As the valley relishes in its deep slumber,
The mist creeps in and kisses my feet,
I go further into the layers of my quilt,
Too curious I am to know the end of my dream.

I ain’t sure when I woke up,
But am sure that others were still dreaming,
I saw myself in the mirror,
And after too many days to remember, saw myself smile.

I hate the fact that we wake up with the same feeling,
Day after day, year after year it’s the same.
What if something abnormal happens at times?
Like snowing in the middle of summer,
Like flowers blooming in autumn,
Like a feeling that something great is in store for us…

Dew dripping down the trees,
Clouds hanging around searching for a place,
Hills singing in melody for the monsoon,
And we thought that everyday is the same.

Late last night, something exceptional happened,
The hills for the first time in ages had turned white!
Reflecting like a mirror, they shone like silver,
So strong was the glaze that even the Sun closed his eyes.

I kept the morning coffee aside and gazed around,
The aroma of dawn filled my mind,
I can’t help but think, if this isn’t beauty then what is?
If this isn’t bliss then what is?

Dallying and sauntering on the boulevard
Singing with the wind and catching the snow,
I smiled at the Tulips and Roses in my hand,
And there it was…the Sun in its full glory,
For a moment it looked as if heaven had dawned on the hills.

The snow started melting and the drops fell on the rocks,
It’s probably the most soothing sound in the world,
Sounds as if an invisible Mozart at his best!
And what bigger Opera can there be if there are birds chirping along.


The warmth of the Sun set the vale ablaze,
The silence of the night gave way to the din of the day,
And by the time the town was on its feet, snow was gone
Alas it was just another day for most of them!

I am back to my room and thought the day passed too soon,
When would I get to see the snow again?
When would the hills drape in ubiquitous silence again?
I sleep again wishing that I won’t wake up the same way as today
I sleep again wishing that I would smile and hope a great day is in store,
I sleep again…dreaming that there would be another morning…
I sleep again….to see another dawn.

Road to Nirvana

Just another day in just another town,
Walking, strolling, and dancing in the wind,
I wonder why the sun always rises from the East,
It makes the Sun so predictable!

I see, plenty others staring at Him,
Hoping that He would show some mercy,
I wonder what they lose if their prayers are unheard,
Life goes on like the eternal sun.

I thought my job was perhaps the most banal of all,
And thought, there are thousands of bored people like me,
I saw the Sun and the prayers,
And realized that my life is no different from theirs,
We walk the same road and crisscross in oblivion

What would I be if I wasn’t just another average Joe, with an average job?
What would I do, if I had no reason to work?
What would I do, if I had no reason to live?
What would I do…why should I do anything?

What drives us crazy to do something?
Hope that it will be a better day tomorrow?
Will to succeed and be the best?
Madness to rise above the rest?

I ask my alter-ego who seems to be always happy
Maybe it exists to see another Sunrise, to see another sunset,
To see another smile, to see another tear,
To see another night, to see another moon & stars,
Live on…Live on…Eternity comes before 100!

Am just another ghost, in just another town,
Waiting for the sun to rise to start my day
A day devoid of reason, but ironically, the means to find a reason
If everything is so predictable, then where does the smile or tears come from?

I tell my shadow to follow me,
Too difficult to lay all your egos at rest,
If escaping from yourself is the solution,
Where would you go to live a life?
It’s the same sun, same wind, and same night everywhere.
Madness, confusion, smile, tears, hope, destiny, Oblivion, Chaos, Win, Loss, Conquer, Defeat, Bliss, Innocence, Happiness, Knowledge, Nirvana….

What dreams may come true?

Far away in the sky,
Came an unlikely guest to peep across the horizon,
A horizon quite unlikely to have taken place
But when it did, nothing could stop it.

The flakes of snow which kissed my cheeks all this time,
seem to have vanished in no time
And the moment the sun came into the picture,
I knew I had a reason to smile.

What does it mean to smile...to chuckle?
I look at the solitary swing in my backyard,
And smile at an era bygone, when there was joy around,
Now, all I do is wonder what and when did things go wrong?

Isolated are the streets and so are my dreams,
I can't think of anything different from what I see,
Images gory pass through my mind,
but i wonder who gives them a reason to occur in first place.

I hold the edges of the threads dangling from my mother's dress,
And think of the days, when this would have been an oddity
that the queen of the house can't maintain the dress properly
But what do I do, I see the awkward silence on her face
And wonder, where did her aura go?

All I hear outside are boots singing in unison,
they remind me of another futile battle,
A battle, where everything is lost after the victory.
It's not the battle for power but of egos

I cry not because I am sad, but to wash the dirt on my face,
I can't think any more and have dreams
But if I am still existing, then maybe there's still some hope left
To see the day, when I can walk down the road without any fear...

I dream to see the sky azure, without any smoke
I dream to fly a kite without a bullet piercing it,
I dream to walk around the bazaar and haggle for everything possible
I dream to sleep everynight without fear
I dream...to dream...and dream...and dream...

I, Dream

Rays of Sun with a gentle breeze,
Birds chirping in a distant corner,
And a coffee in hand & smile on your face and next,
Is it yet another day or am I waking up to one?

Traveling through hordes of anxious eyes,
Trying to come across the same as yours,
What wishes may come true?
What dreams may come true?

I am not on top where I have to be,
Maybe that’s a good thing to know that you have a long way to go,
And a step forward is just the starting,
You might just end up at a different destination.

What’s good for me & what’s bad…
Do I know or should I know?
I look around to understand this,
And find the same rebound.

Anxiety should I call it or fear of unknown,
At a time when every moment is meant to be exciting,
I sniff something around,
I think I am trying to read alien thoughts.

I am not crawling, am trying to walk,
I want to fall down,
I want to melt infront of an adversary,
And when I see myself standing the next day,
I know I have won, I am still standing.

Walk until you droop, you will know the road,
Run until you stop, you will endure the fight & the race,
Live and let the destiny take you along,
After all things shouldn’t be kept under control.

Dream….dream….dream
What dreams can you dream?
What dreams do you wish would come true?
What dreams end as dreams?
I, Dream….Do you?

-Hemanth

(23-10-07)

This poem was written on the second day at Satyam...Auditorium, loads of people around and me...

The "Y" Side...

A generous smile greeted me when I opened my eyes,
It was different around than what I had imagined in my mother's womb,
I tried to move around and saw him then,
My source, such was his graceful appearance...

I instantly realised that I knew him,
He had heard me move in my mother's womb,
Placing his hand to feel how big I had grown,
That was my first contact with things alien separated by a thin membrane..

One day, he took me around,
me sitting on his shoulders,
to a place too far that I can't remember,
To see a Sun setting, a life down the hill gearing up for the night.

I wondered, why he was so calm most of the time,
Everyone else around seem to talk as if there's no tomorrow,
He replied for everything with an unreasonable smile and calmness,
I believed everything what others had told about him...he was so unusual!

One fine day, I happened to see his other side,
He was talking too much....and something seemed to be awry,
I think he just wanted to be himself,
A shade of his persona which was unknown to many.

Years later I looked at myself in the mirror,
And couldn't stop wondering,
How in the world could two people be so similar!
I had inherited his calmness...that eternal calmness!
and everything which people couldn't understand about him...

He's more than twice my age now
and staring down at the other half of life,
he drops a little hints here and there,
just to make me realize that my days have come to stand up for the rest!

Another day,Another night
I come across the bills and recall those visits,
For a moment I forget about the blood and hysteria around
Thinking about the feeling of togetherness...if only for a brief time
A privacy felt amongst a crowd...in a foreign land...

I think the day isn't too far,
which he had been preparing me for,
A day when he no longer would be on my side holding my hand
and let me fly free with time...

If only he could be with me,
To let me put my head on his shoulder,
and see the sun going down the sea,
With a calmness that exists between us...


P.S...To a person who gave me my name
From a person trying to live upto that name....

Alapana...

A chorus in my backyard forced me to take notice,
Something so soothing...so reminiscent of days of my youth,
I walk now with a stick in my hand,
which never forgets to remind me of the days to come...

The evening sun infront of the house was going down the sea,
A glowing red spreads across the waters
Never had it ceased to amuse me as a child,
That Sea could engulf something so powerful...

The little waves touching my feet,
taking the sand away from underneath,
Something like time does to you...
Takes away moments but promising to return with better ones...

Once, I prayed so hard to let me fall back in time,
To a life that I had once lived,
Where all I would care was to forget about time,
That was the time when the next day was more promising...

I was amidst people who were brimming with life,
Bustling but serene at the same time,
When severing was not in mind,
yet knowing that one day we have to face it.

And then we did face it,
promising each other to never forget,
Etching the memories to our souls,
we moved on to the other side of life...

That's when probably I began thinking about time,
and from then on it started going faster than I thought of,
Years later, I looked back,
Found nothing apart from the lingering images of my youth...

I ask the rain, do you fall there too?
Where someone I know lives...
I ask the wind, do you blow there too?
Where someone I know lives...

Perhaps the sun is the best of all the messengers,
Rising in one part of the world while setting in the opposite,
It soothed me that we all share the same warmth,
Just reflecting what someone else is thinking in some part of the world...

I smiled that the waves washing my feet,
once kissed the feet of others I knew,
It made me jealous for an instant,
that when I couldn't,they met the ones I love.

The dusk reminded me of the night to come,
Reminding me that the time has come,
To walk back into oblivion of my life,
And seek a rhythm to this dwindling life....

I smile at the days bygone and hope the time keeps its promise,
But life's just that...made up of broken promises and hopes of undoing that,
Pure melody I would say, this way of life,
Chaotic yet reminding you that serenity exists in some part of the world,
A peace which everybody seeks, but only some find....

Dedicated to.....12 men with whom Time had been glorious(I wish there was no such thing as time!), a friend whose passion for books/theatre is immense, a friend who has never ceased to surprise me(my best partner when it comes to movies!)..."A n S", a journey through the lanes of Pilani which introduced another friend into list of specials, a lovely friendship forged in 3-2(i regret for not knowing all of them before...but better late than never!)....a lovely school where I first learnt to "converse".....Orkut/Facebook/Yahoo msgr for keeping those conversations alive after 8 long years!....and everyone else with whom I have spend my days and those whom I always to know but couldn't....[:)]

Note....In Indian classical music, an alapana is defined as the exposition of a raga(Melody). The flavor of the raga is outlined in the alapana by rendering the raga's permitted notes in structures and phrases unique to the raga. Alapana typically precedes a song that is going to be sung in the given raga.

Samsara...

A fine morning greeted by singing birds and warm sun,
There was buzz around nothing like I had ever seen,
Quite an anxious day it was turning out to be,
I was being goaded to prepare myself to meet my prospective in-laws along with their son,

It was as if my whole life depended on that nod!
How old was I? Twenty??
I was cajoled to leave everything in the hands of God...
It wasn't the God that I thought of, but my life ahead which was filled with hopes plenty.

Little after 9 I guess, they had come,
I couldn't wait and saw the guy from a crack on the door,
Impressive I thought, he looked too calm!
My plans had changed now and I toyed with the idea of life with him more and more...

I walked into the room and pretended not to see him,
He didn't look at me either, but had the nerve to request for a private moment with me,
I wondered what he's gonna say
That was the first time I cursed myself for being unprepared for this moment

He looked around the room,
And admired the zari on my saree,
Maybe he didn't know where to start,
And I comforted him by blurting out something stupid!

After sometime we seemed to have hit a roadblock,
This was more or less a negotation
of what he likes and what I like,
little did we know how we are gonna end it!

And the unexpected happened atlast...
He asked, "What do you expect from me?"
I seriously had no clue...I had never thought about it myself,
He repeated once more, but I couldn't say anything..

Now it was my turn and I struck my blow!
I asked,"Are you ready for this?"
This caught him off-guard and he kept calm,
Both of us kept calm and looked into each other's eyes.

A little later, everything was fixed,
nobody gave us a chance to speak,
we were told that we were too shy to say anything
So...there it was...things worked out without even my nod.

Years later....one fine night,
I woke up to the sound of a thunder in the middle of a rain,
Wondering if my life was a dream or just a joke,
I looked around and found nothing but silence.
Silence and more of it, I had all day,
But I couldn't get an answer for that "why?"
Why did this happen?
Why didn't anyone stop it?

When I met him first, he asked me,
How do you see your life 10 years down the lane?
I didn't have an answer, but he did
I wonder why he never told me what he had in mind.

Over the years, the roads diverged
and one fine afternoon that happened.
Ever since I tried hard to connect the dots of our lives
Trying to understand if he was one unhappy or was it me?

The smile on my face is gone
replacing that is a eternal gloom
of having done something terrible
An unfathomable fear of being the reason for his death.

Yes, he died...but he had killed me years before,
Years before, when he became indifferent to my presence,
It was as if I am no more than a ghost,
Ghost who destroyed his Samsara...

His Samsara...where I didn't have a place!

The Cursed...

The drops of rain kissing my body woke me up,
And people I saw around me giving a look profound,
How many times do I tell them that such things I scorn,
Yet the anger of my thoughts dies without making a sound.

Many a times I think with this burden on my back,
How cruel could Zeus be to give such a spherical shape to this stack,
How could he do this to me?...I merely played my part in the war...
he cursed me to bear this burden for eternity!

You know what the worst part is?...
I can't look at the Heaven, though it's me who bears the burden
Neither can I see the Earth , though it's just below where the heaven is,
Day and night, I look down and see nothing but a path untrodden.

I wasn't meant to be like this,
I hope my Lord would heed to my prayers,
but he never forgets to mention the betrayal,
and that erodes my hopes of redemption layer by layer.

All you creatures glaring at me from down there,
I have just one thing to tell you,
Don't forget that you too have a burden on your shoulders,
The burden of hopes and that of consequences,
You can't escape it, yet you think I am the only one around to carry it!

My lord! You have kept me down for time immemorial,
Yet I never understood what delight that begets
Maybe soon, one day you will realise my worth
And that day, I will look into your eyes
And say to myself, so this is how you look after all these years?

I once had a dream, to stand tall!
That's still a dream, but maybe the day isn't too far
I will swim across this pool and put the sphere under my feet
And scream....I am Atlas, the immortal Titan!

I am Atlas...I am Atlas...

What lies Beyond??

One...two..three...I am coming,
"Sebastian, Ariel I shall find you".
I swim rather quickly flapping my small fins,
But I seem to be falling behind the other two.

Atlast I see them laughing in one corner
Laughing at my innocent and curious looks to find them,
I give up and swim across to join them rather meekly,
It's all so beautiful with them....we dance, we swim.

One day, I looked at the mighty gates of Atlantis,
Sebastian told me that beyond it lies a world turbulent,
So turbulent that you rarely have a chance to look back
I couldn't take my eyes of those gates, beyond it everthing looked fabulous

I began to think about those gates day and night
and began wondering how would life be without Sebastian and Airel?
Finally, I dared one day and crossed those gates
And I told myself,"Flounder, Here you go........!"

I swam..I swam as if there was no end,
All along, there were schools of others like me,
And there were corals, plants alien to me
Everything looked so beautiful and merry

And then I reached the edge of that land,
Beyond that, it was getting darker
I remembered Sebastian's words about a turbulent world,
I wondered if this was that? Yet, I couldn't stop myself...I carried on.

Somewhere down there, I got sucked into the current,
I couldn't look back...there was no looking back
I loved my ride, but little did I know where I would end up,
Something about life beyond the gates intrigued me.

The water was calm again, and I had no clue where to go,
Suddenly a Shark saw me and invited to have dinner with him,
I didn't like him and so I carried on my journey,
But perhaps that was my mistake, I should have stayed back with him

I turned and found myself heading straight towards the whale
It sucked everything down and I was afraid of getting lost
I tried to flap back and don't fall trap to this,
somewhere I prayed that I should have died in the hands of that shark rather than the whale!

The situation got too frantic
and as a last resort I prayed
O King Triton...O God Posiedon...Help Me...Help Me!
I don't know who it was, but with that flash of lightening I fainted

I woke up amidst Ariel and Sebastian,
They were laughing again that I had a daydream!
I smiled at my moronic dream,
Yet..I couldn't stop thinking about the life beyond...

What lies beyond? What lies beyond?

Hope....

I fell down from heaven,
and was about to go where others go;
but maybe it was the wind,
I drifted away and no longer knew where I would go.

Up in the heaven sat my lord who said
"What are you doing? Don't you see you have strayed from your path?"
I couldn't wait to hear him,
I got sucked down to the earth

As we moved forward, I saw others falling into the sea,
they said, that's where we have to go;
I looked at myself determined to go the other way
This was my maiden journey and I couldn't go back

My lord up there banished me,
said, I betrayed everybody,
and that, heaven's door is closed forever for me!
I wondered if he had noticed what wind had done?

As I was falling down,
I saw a man sqautting beside a field mown,
Alas! I saw the agony in his eyes,
I saw the hope that one day someone like me would arrive;

My journey had a purpose
and I was soon going to be His messenger!
How you ask me? Haven't you heard of what are called as prayers?
My lord happens to listen to some of them;

Soon I found out that he was a farmer,
and I wanted to greet him with such a force
that he would notice me and open the doors
to his hope that Lord would listen to his murmur!

In an instant, I think I touched him,
I think he looked up
I think he saw where others had fallen,
As I lay dead infront of his eyes,
he smiled and wanted others to come

I came to an end...a tragic end
because never had I thought that someone would smile at my death!
but perhaps this was a message that to my Lord I send,
No matter how we stray, there's always a purpose
and no purpose is unworthy because it always results in something!

You ask me, what did my purpose result in?
Maybe more prayers....but I think it was Hope....and keeping it alive..
Beause that hope always results in something..


Hemanth
21/8/07

Highway to Truth

once upon a time...maybe long ago,
it's believed that someone popped up in the garden of Eden,
after a moment of bliss, in came satan;
and tempted to commit the sin upon which He had decreed an embargo.

In a state of anger, He lost his senses,
and shunned his children to mortality
And years after they descended, they started building fences
And generations later they forgot the meaning of morality!

He saw that we were forgetting Him,
so he sent his messengers to remind about His presence,
for a moment there was no bounds to one's effervescenece
but I think it all started there and for some strange reason we divided Him,

In a strange turn of events, the apple turned the world around,
the infamous fruit had invoked a genius
things were never same again and a notion lost its ground,
A notion that He is the unquestionable genius!

Soon, they started defining things,
until one day, someone shattered the whole world
he proved that, God is just a made up story
and the reality is much more complex

Years later, another defined energy,
yet he looked at stars and exclaimed,"How can you look at stars and say God doesn't exist?"
You call him genius, but he's the most Humane Human
he initiated the eternal question!

Does God exist?
Is science the new Tower of Babel?
Everytime you define something ethereal,
you climb one level of the tower
maybe one day we will reach the tip too....

I just hope He doesn't show up in some corner,
that will just shatter everything that we have believed in so far,
Words, art, music have changed with time,
what if notions don't change?

I am no more naive,
I maybe wrong, but i am on the highway to truth
truth that will one day define what science has been trying for so long,
But, What if i reach that truth?...
If something is proved then science will have an upperhand,
does that mean, defining God will mean that He isn't what we think,
Will that proof make me an athiest?

Hemanth
19/8/07

Night

It all happened one cold night, when I took a turn wrong...
and ended on a path unknown,
with snow dancing down from heaven
I greeted the wind on my cheeks with contempt;

Not that I hated the wind,
but the day was very unkind....perhaps it was my life that was!
Days, I spent wandering for something,
perhaps it's been years or maybe more.

I was told by many that I was looking for truth about too many things,
Things perhaps that I shouldn't ask myself,
why am I walking down this road?
Where would I reach?
It makes me all the more miserable....this having to choose!

I think I heard music somewhere on that road,
and I walked over to the fence to see what it was,
the strings of some instrument created magic,
and I heard something that I hadn't before;

I looked around and saw people sleeping,
and I looked at the grass they stamped below,
The air suddenly turned warm,
I couldn't understand why?

Maybe there were too many people,
maybe it was the magic of the music,
Someone told me that it's just movement of air molecules,
if that's so, then what's cold wind?
Am I falling deaf to things around?

I looked around and saw the joy and applause,
I saw the courteous thanking of the musicians,
I saw the harmony of life there,
I shifted my glance towards a baby, a little angel there,
I saw her curious glances and innocent smile

And I smiled....or maybe a smile escaped from my heart,
because I saw myself in her eyes,
I was no different than her; then what is this that torments me?
Am I carrying a burden to be someone among the crowd?
I think I am...and I don't know why?

Perhaps that's my quest now,
I looked towards the sky and saw the night glowing with stars,
They were smiling back and I was happy I looked at them,
It's been so long since I looked up...since I was happy.
And it all happened one night, when I took a turn wrong...

Hemanth
15/8/07